Breaking Up Survival Skills: Kissing A Frog


Princess and the Frog dtd 031813

Depending on how things ended will dictate your transition. I recently broke up with a man I dated for a year. I did not see it coming, but because I’m a realist and live in reality, it didn’t shut me down. He basically mentioned he’d been talking to another woman over the phone and he enjoyed their conversations, in his words “they had great conversations” and he wasn’t sure where it might go, so he wanted to give me a “heads up”. WOW! I reached over for my glass of water because I was immediately parched… So I broke up with him, he had disrespected our relationship, he’d disrespected me, he’d violated my trust and my love. I was firm about it, explained it and was done. Surprisingly enough, I wasn’t sad; I was disappointed, but not because of the year spent, not because I trusted him, but because he didn’t want it bad enough! Because many times we make things more difficult than they actually are… For instance, you have a wonderful person in your life; they’re smart, funny, spiritual and easy on the eyes… But that grass across the way looks so green from your window… We forget that grass is living, it requires nurturing, water, heat, sun, some shit every now and again, it needs to be pulled up and replanted sometimes, but what the gardener never does is abandons his duty, his commitment to making his grass the best!

Love and Respect dtd 031813

So fast forwarding to the present, he still calls, he still stops by to see and talk to various family members to plead with them to assist him because he doesn’t “know” what he did… Really? No, he chooses not to be responsible for his actions that caused the demise of our relationship. That in itself is unacceptable… So with that said, do I miss his presence-yes, do I have to break the habits I’ve created over the last year-yes… But guess what? Nothing is more important than R-E-S-P-E-C-T (thanks Aretha)!!! If you are not getting the respect you know you deserve, time to reassess and possibly close a door or two! Take it from me, there’s somebody for everybody, you just got to wean through all these frogs to get to your prince/princess… Believe me it’s better to be the “One that got away” than to be the one that’s thirsty! Leave them speechless and ever wanting more…

Committment to Love dtd 031813

LOVE STILL EXISTS – The DivorcedDiva


Happily divorced mother of one. I date when I find a worthy partner. I love to talk about relationships, work through problems with people and remind them of their options. I'm very open and willing to share all of my experiences to help others.


  1. Ms. Nix

    March 20, 2013 at 12:40 pm

    The DivorcedDiva did a great job.

  2. FabEllis

    March 20, 2013 at 6:00 am

    Great post!

  3. Neisha Jo

    March 19, 2013 at 6:32 am

    Loved this post! That talk about nurturing the grass and how it needs love, water, and fertilizer every now and then really put things in perspective. I’ll be sharing with a few friends. Thanks for posting on BLM this morning :)

    • admin

      March 19, 2013 at 9:41 am

      Thank you so much for responding. Yes, if more men worried about tending their own backyards and stop looking over the fence then maybe they would find they already have what they need.

  4. Goodlooknout

    March 19, 2013 at 5:45 am

    I agree with you girl! Although I do appreciate he told you about other chick from the get, he had to GO! It was almost like he was testing you, to see how much BS you’d accept!

    • admin

      March 19, 2013 at 9:38 am

      Absolutely, men will push the envelope and do what you allow them to do to you!!!! You got to know when to let go!!!

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