True Love…is it real?

A few weeks ago I was scrolling through my Facebook feed, when I came across a question (status update) that I’ve been asked throughout most of my life:

Do you believe in The One (Soul Mate)?  Do you believe that you were destined to spend your life with one special person? 

I have always answered yes to this question.  No matter what I’m going through I just know that there is one person that is out there for me; someone that will work with me, and love me flaws and all – someone that will inspire me and push me to be better.  My observation/opinion on people (male or female) who don’t believe in the one is that they’re hurt. They’ve been burned one too many times. I mean honestly have you heard of anyone happy in their marriage/relationship saying they don’t believe in the one.




Clearly you haven’t met the one if you don’t believe in it!  There’s always that ONE person out there waiting to prove you wrong.

Moving forward I asked some friends how they felt about The One. Some believe in The One while some didn’t.  Some didn’t believe it until later in their marriage that they were with the person they were meant to spend their lives with.  My mind was still going from all of the opinions, so I decided to surf the net and find some articles on the topic of discussion.  I found this article titled,

Why You Shouldn’t Believe in Soul Mates by Dr. Jeremy Nicholson. I thought it was very informative as far as statistics go, but I still believe in True Love.

Me personally, I’ve had a laundry list of guys that I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with. Not the case…

For example, when I was 7 (yes 7 years old); I was madly in love with my 14 year old neighbor. I was at his door every day after school asking for a hug, until that one day his mom answered and asked me not to come knocking at her door anymore asking her baby for hugs. It wasn’t quite those words, , but that Sh*t cut DEEP! As I got older, there were a gang of fools I played the fool for, and I often wonder WTF WAS I THINKING! I won’t even get into how Mr. Dalvin (from Jodeci), Nas, Denzel Washington, Romeo (from Immature), etc. were my future husbands and NO ONE could tell me otherwise.

There were countless guys I (keyword coming in 5, 4, 3, 2…) THOUGHT I would spend the rest of my life with. When you’re getting to know someone that you are instantly vibing with (not to mention you’re attracted to), it’s easy to get carried away with the potential that this could in fact be The One. But we all know it takes work! And it’s not always going to be sugary sweet.


What I took from Dr. Jeremy’s article on soul mates, was that there are two different types of romantics:

1.  People who believe in Romantic Destiny – Believe in initial compatibility, that vibe, or that spark. The downside of this, is when sh*t gets real, the romantic destiny believer jumps ship because things become challenging. No bueno

2.  People who believe in Romantic Growth – Believe they don’t have to have a strong connection to have a lasting relationship. They believe in growth. To me it’s kind of like settling, because what they lack is passion and it makes me wonder why you want to be in a relationship that lacks passion.

What do you believe in?

Well I believe in both.  A balance of the two! I’ve heard so many success stories about someone finding their true love. Whether it’s through online dating,  a social network,  high school sweetheart, or someone leaving the country and finding The One. The possibilities are endless!

Life is what you make it, and that applies to love too.

If love is what we make it, why do we make it so complicated when we know how simple it is?

Why are we scared of love, but yet we want it so badly?

Why do we give up on love but we beg for love not to give up on us?






I've seen it all, been through it all and I am still standing strong. I have very little patience for foolishness but I have enough compassion and drive to help those who ask for help. Recently, I got tired of seeing women just making some poor choices and having made many mistakes in my life; I am here to help you out!


    • Ms. Nix

      September 28, 2013 at 7:53 am

      Hey Ebony

    • Ms. Nix

      September 28, 2013 at 7:50 am

      Congrats Larry!!! I do believe people can find their soulmate and it’s apparent you found yours!!!