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Legs spread, panties down, heart open, ready set fall in love! I couldn’t have imagined a better delightfully sinful love. There is no way to justify breaking up a marriage under any circumstances, but what if the marriage is already broken. The vows say to love, honor, and cherish, well what if they were all built on a lie and now you’re trapped? I do not condone women ruining marriages, for some that is their only purpose and just like a man they run when they get what they want. I’ve watched so many women walk into hotel rooms and walk out with cash…then move to the next room. That wasn’t my style. I was looking to be number one and the only one and that is what Carlos gave me…until…
One of my Public Relations friends hooked me up to do some on site press wrangling work when the football season kicked off. I went into the locker room to prep all of the star players for interviews. Amidst all the arrogance in the air emerged this handsome perfectly molded man that glistened under the locker room lights. He walked over and said something to me then winked, I couldn’t tell you to this day what he said. After the game I went to the unofficial team party with my friend at one of the players elaborate bachelor pads and there he was again. This time he actually engaged me in real conversation with the drinks flowing all night. We ended up walking the balcony back and forth under the moonlight talking about the game, our life aspirations then finally the kind of love we wanted. He offered to drive me home in his red Dodge Charger that he claimed he loved so much.
When he opened my door I purposefully gave him a quick peek up my skirt, winked, and started walking off. He pulled me back and said I can’t take this anymore then grabbed my body and kissed me. This wasn’t my style but there was something about his spirit that I craved to be a part of. I climbed up his body and whipped my head around kissing and grabbing him. He opened up the driver side door and I climbed in with him behind me. He laid the seat all the way back, lifted my skirt, strapped up and slid into my dripping wet cavern of ecstasy. He gently stroked me to ease himself into me until I was comfortable then pounded me so hard that the Dodge emblem on the wheel was imprinted on my breast. I saw a cop walking up in the distance and hopped out of the car. He chased after me into my building and up the stairs then cornered me between the third and fourth floor. I pointed to my apartment and he said what you want me to wait? He picked me up, spread my legs, and bounced up and down on it hitting my G-spot every time. When I was about to scream, he covered my mouth and laughed, and we headed into my apartment. We never made it to the bed judging by the trail of clothes, panties, and boxers leading only to the door of my bedroom.
The next morning I woke up to his peaceful eyes and gentle hands caressing my face. I let him know that this was not usually my style and he said me either…I’m married. I jumped out of bed so fast and threw him out with his clothes while he stuttered trying to explain why he slept with me. I wasn’t hearing any of it and felt so ashamed of myself for possibly breaking up a marriage. The following Wednesday I got a call back from the team owner to join the team PR staff. While the career move was great I was dreading seeing Carlos on a regular basis. On the first road trip he came and sat next to me and explained that he and his wife were currently in the finalization of a divorce. She was trying everything she could to hang on to the NFL Wife lifestyle and none of the love. When he met me he thought he could regain some of the love he craved. Clearly we weren’t about to fall in love off of a one night stand and I let him know that. He just laughed it off with that Dwayne Johnson grin that I couldn’t resist…and miss so much.
When we traveled with the team we snuck off in between practices for lunch dates, seeing the sights, or the occasional love making in a park, car, and more. No one knew about our affair and we wanted to keep it that way to keep prying press or his wife’s ‘spies’ from causing unnecessary havoc. Since he was not giving her a dime she made their divorce a very ugly public battle that he did not need or deserve. We would be sure to book hotel rooms that were on the opposite side of the team and charged it to his frequent migraines as well as other evasive actions. When we got to Dallas we were making love on the dresser rocking the whole room and he stopped looked at me, grabbed my face and said I love you. Of course I said it back and he continued to stroke me harder and harder. At the end of the season his divorce was final and he took me to the 50-yard-line of the home field to celebrate with a bottle of champagne.
When I turned to pop the champagne bottle Carlos was on one knee with a sideways playbook that said Will You Marry Me on one side and Touchdown and Out of Bounds written on the other in blue and red ink. I couldn’t stop laughing when he handed me the marker cheesing and shaking anxiously awaiting my answer. I circled touchdown, jumped into his arms and he swung and tossed me around showboating in the middle of the field. We still kept wanted to keep everything secret from the team until I found a new job. He honored the fact that I wanted to work and didn’t want me to feel out of place. We went to his lawyer and coach and told them the big news, which was no surprise to them. They decided they would announce our engagement at the start of the next season so it would not look like I broke up their marriage; and I got to keep my job!
His lawyer ordered my ring so no suspicions would arise and I anxiously awaited the arrival. Nothing could’ve prepared me for the biggest heartbreak of my life. The following Monday morning I got a call from my best friend who knew about our love telling me to turn on the news. When I turned on the TV the headline read Star Player and Hero Carlos Stanton Dead. He was just leaving his lawyers office and about to go catch a flight for an endorsement opportunity in the Midwest. A little boy ran into the street chasing his toy while a drunk man driving Chevy Suburban was barreling down the street towards him. Carlos sprinted out to the boy knocked him out of the way and the truck hit him instead. He was killed on impact. I couldn’t breathe. I think my heart literally bled that day. At the services I couldn’t cry because I had spent the last three days crying at the morgue, funeral home, to the press, and in my home. I just stared at the casket in total disbelief that the first man to truly love me was gone.
About a week later his lawyer showed up at my door with an envelope and a ring box. We sat down together and he read me his will that he adjusted right before he died leaving the majority of his estate to me and the rest to his family. Then he handed me the ring box and said that Carlos left me a brief love letter with the will and he put in the box for me to keep. The ring was beautiful and the note said: All I have to give you is love. And if I’m not here to give it to you, I want you to find it, enjoy it, live and breathe it. That is what you, my angel, deserves. I love you.- Carlos.
What I learned from my love with Carlos was to embrace the life and love that comes our way. We are not built to be alone in this world and the better side of me is gone. Or so I thought. Over the next two months I slowly began to collect the money and items that I didn’t want from his estate and read his letter every day yearning for him to come back somehow. Then I felt really sick and tired and couldn’t stop crying and my friends thought I was drowning in my grief. After a doctor visit I found myself driving to his parent’s home for the first time with news that my Carlos continues to live on with the love growing inside of me. He left me his love and that was all I needed to continue on.
About the Author:
Carmen Fletcher is a Public Relations Manager and writer that willingly shares her perspective on life, love, and more through poetry, testimonies, and inspirational stories. She is a Contributing Writer on www.breathoflifedaily.com and has contributed to the book Super Singles Activate! Testimonies to Inspire and Uplift the Single Woman. In addition she is currently working on several books and orchestrating the Rise Above campaign featured on the fan page of inspirational book Yes! Confess Success www.facebook.com/CBFWorld